Simmons puts ice cubes in his cereal and I'm reminded of the Top 5 weirdest cereals ever made
I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume that NO one else puts ice cubes in their cereal, Gene.
I mean, what the hell man?!
But since we're on the topic, let's remind ourselves of 5 of the weirdest cereals to ever make it into a bowl.
Honestly, I just can't get passed the name.
"Hey kids who wants some Freakies for breakfast?!"
Besides that, their mascot was 7 strange creatures that make me feel uncomfortable when I look at them and their free toy of a "Freakie Comic Book" sounds like anime porn, to be honest. So no thank you.
4. Crunchy Loggs
Don't lie- when you read the name Crunchy Loggs the first thing you did was check to see if the logs were brown and looked like poo. Or maybe that's just me...Any way, their mascot Bixby Beaver and the team struggled convince kids they should eat logs for breakfast (shocker) and they only lasted a couple years.
3. Sir Grapefellow
I don't know about you but I've always hated artificial grape flavor. Give me orange, cherry, lemon, lime flavors or literally anything else for snacks but grape, no way. Not only that, this cereal is basically just oats and tries to sell kids on being "Vitamin Charged!" Kids don't wanna hear that shit, adults barely do either. (PS...Lol @ the free toy inside)
2. Kellogg's OJ's
Cereal that tastes like Orange Juice........Need I say more? Can you imagine the combination of OJ and Milk in a bowl as soon as you wake up? Yikes. Hard pass.
1. King Vitaman
And the winner for weirdest cereal is....KING VITAMAN!
There's a reason that cereal mascots are cartoons, not humans, and this old creepy man reminds of us that common sense. As if the mascot wasn't terrible enough, the cereal was marketed as "The 100% Vitamin and Iron Cereal" ... Can you imagine how bad this must have tasted? Kids (and adults) don't eat cereal because it's healthy for us. We eat it because we want allllll the sugar and satisfaction. You failed us completely, King Vitaman.
Honorable Mention: Liquid Cereal
The only reason this one isn't in the top 5 is because, well, it's not actually cereal. I can only imagine how mushy and disgusting these were and we'll leave it at that.
Thank you, Gene Simmons, for reminding us that you can ruin anything good with just the right amount of weirdness.
To restore all of our faith in humanity, here's some words of wisdom in a reply from Prince Izzy on Twitter: